Awake? ... Yes

In which Tonia makes more excuses for her lack of committment and tells us why her boss is such a major bitch...

"Wow, you are so lucky! It must be great to be your own boss!"

Judging by a person's reaction to that sentence, it is perfectly clear whether they have ever been self-employed or not.

It's something I hear time and again, and yes, for the most part being my own boss is pretty cool.
But the flipside to that is having me as a boss.

And here is what I can tell you about my boss:

She is a major punk-assed BITCH.

She is overly critical of my work whilst always finding the positive in others'; she punishes me excessively for the most minor hiccups; she stands in the way of me doing constructive tasks, insisting instead that I do things far beyond my capability; she sets me up to take on far more jobs than I can do in the time I have... I could go on, but I am sure you get the message.

I have just returned to work today from a depression break of... well, far too long. I shan't go into it in any depth, cos: Hello? Comedy! But I haven't coped well for pretty much the whole year.
And you won't get that from looking at my public feeds because it is very easy to hide depression under a couple of witty tweets each day, but I have been struggling. Don't feel sorry for me, though. There were decisions to be made long ago and I put off making them, which leaves me in a life which although it makes me desperately unhappy I did choose, so it's up to me to deal with it.

But I haven't been.

From now, though, I am.

But here is where I get back to my bitch of a boss, because day one after a five month haitus and here I am presented with a to-do list of epic proportions with people who have waited far longer than they should have for certain things, a heap of posts for you and at least three all-new 'start from scratch' projects which are very exciting and could lead to great things... but which are scary, difficult and possiibly a little beyond me. And she has very high expectations on all fronts.

So what of this space?

Well, there are a billion-and-ten articles part written for you. And a couple I have written for other comedy blogs... but you'll have to wait. I have set out so many times thinking to complete a batch to post for you and failed miserably, so my sole aim for today is post this. You know, just to remind you all I am still here.

And still laughing.

Because some days it feels that laughter is all you have.

On which note, I am currently working in the garden (because: Self-employed!) in my bikini (that visual is free, for which you are absolutely welcome!) and seem to have chosen a spider nest in which to site my lounger as I now have no fewer than seven... yes, SEVEN... tiny spiders on one part of my body or another.

But before you laugh at my misfortune, just take a look at where you are working right now. Are there birds and butterflies? Trees? Flowers? Fresh air? SUNSHINE?

Hmmm....

*sneezes* *rubs eyes*

More on Awards...

I had intended to post a lengthy report on the British Comedy Awards - in fact, it is written ... and I spent ages working up some graphics too... but I decided I didn't want to post it after all. Instead, I want to address some points which have arisen from conversations since.

Firstly is the idea of judging comedy at all.
Whether we laugh at a particular joke or not comes of our own circumstance, our beliefs and opinions; there is not a single joke which everyone in the world finds funny. This is why I so enjoy hearing from you all about what you find funny: people who send me links to things they feel I should watch or hear; those who post in the comments area here or on facebook telling me why they agree or disagree with my opinions; people who invite me along to events; anyone who has ever said or written the phrase "You'll love this!" You all offer up your own perspective which is no less or more valid than my own. Likewise the opinion of a panel making the choices for an award ceremony. Who is to say that what that small group of people decide is 'the best' truly represents the views of the greater public? Especially when we do not know their true motivation.

There is always a smack of politics about any award ceremony and this one is no different. Does it not invalidate the entire process that the nominees are selected from a pre-approved list? Should someone really be overlooked simply off the back of the fact they would probably not attend the ceremony to collect in person? I was always taught you do not give to receive. This is the same, surely?


Any regular readers will be aware I will never answer a "What is your favourite _?" question, because such things always depend on mood. And there is the issue: ask me now what is the best sitcom at the moment ... go one, ask! Today I will say 'Him and Her' - mostly because that was the last I watched, partly because I am in the frame of mind right now suited to the show. Ask me again later, it will be different... you won't know that until you ask but I guarantee it will change. Does this make me a fickle person? In spite of previous accusations, no. I won't think it is any less funny than I did before, just that my mood will be different or there will be something else at the forefront of my mind which eludes me right now.

So that is the problem.

I recently found myself in conversation with a very dear Cymrutalian friend Gino, which you can see in the comments here: BCA 2012 Blog Post about having some sort of "awards"-type setup here. Part of me thinks that would be fun and something I definitely want to do. But there is also a part of me that just knows there would be a huge bias towards my own favourites... and you all know what those would be.


So here is what I will do.

If the consensus is that you all care enough send ideas.

What/who would you recognise in the "No Fucking Prize it's Just a Bit of a Laugh" awards of 2013?

Categories, nominees, ideas for a better name... anything at all. You can easily find my opinion just by reading more of this blog, so if there is not enough feedback from people who aren't me I will not bother at all... such is the manner of true democracy!

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Robin Ince: Happiness Through Time

I went along to see the fabulous Robin Ince presenting his "Happiness Through Time" show. The show itself was great, although I was extremely disappointed in the people of my hometown in their poor attendance. This was an issue I was able to discuss with him, though, when we met up after the show for my interview for Comedy Southwest.

Whilst I had a set of questions to ask for the interview, we had a good chat, too - because he is just such a thoroughly nice guy!

The low sales in this case he put down to being down to the power of television, believing along with the majority of true fans of comedy that television is killing the circuit; not because people are staying at home to watch it on their screens rather than go out, but because for the most part if you are not touted across the television on a regular basis the public just are not interested in coming to see you. Of course there will always be the hipster-core who would rather avoid the mainstream superacts and deliberately seek out the lesser known, but to be honest it surprised me that Robin Ince falls into this bracket.

So why do we not see him on television as often as others? In his words, because he does not consider himself an expert, in fact his show opens with a disclaimer much to that effect. Some would disagree, others would ask if that really matters given the huge amount of non-entities given screen time; but to him it is important that he has integrity and only offers himself up to talk on subjects he genuinely feels expert in.

It was interesting to hear his opinion on ticket pricing, too. He talked of how he had tried to start some sort of organisation through which acts sold their own tickets and cut out the organisations which add processing fees and other extra costs to the face value. In reality this is a mammoth task and he has found it difficult to find others who would commit as well as finding the time himself to set it up. I feel such a scheme as he described would work brilliantly if there were a way to jump straight to it being in place and working, but I doubt that anyone would be able to get it going without the aid of a time-slip. It is always nice though to hear that comedians are thinking of their audience when planning gigs and organising ticket sales. In particular there are the likes of Sarah Millican having skipped a whole chain of venues in protest at their having added premiums to ticket prices and Rhod Gilbert giving constant reminders to buy through venue box offices directly rather than through ticket agents or auction sites. Of course they are not the only ones taking such action, but being high profile means their actions are more likely to be noticed by those profitting most from the status quo.


As a wife and mum, it was also good to talk to him about his family. He mentions his young son often in his show and I wondered how easy it is to spend long periods away from him and of course Mrs Ince. There was no bravado in his response; he admitted he often finds it very difficult, especially if he has been at home for a while. The timing is such right now, for instance, that Robin has just spent the half term holiday at home after being away for a while and found it hard leave again. He does have worries about being away and brought up the fact that there is a general belief that comedians are prone to depression from being away. He dismisses this, though, and is quick to point out that the actual problem is simply that being alone all day there is time to brood. He spoke of how quite often he would have seen no-one until he arrives at the theatre for his show but he does try to make the most of his time alone in order that when he is at home he can maximise his time with the family.


All-in-all, Robin Ince is a great person; extrememly interesting to listen to, amiable, well-balanced and happy to discuss his opinions whether you agree with him or not. The show was brilliant. There are a few dates left on this run but if you can't get to them, be sure to grab tickets for his next, the Importance of Being Interested. Dates are on his website www.robinince.com so take a look!

Also look out for his DVD, "The Best and the Worst of Robin Ince" coming up next year through the gofasterstripe website (I'll keep you posted on that!)


The interview goes live tomorrow, will update with a link once announced!

Happy Birthday Comedy Southwest

There is something quite special about today; it is the first birthday of a valuable resource for fans of fun and laughter, Comedy South West.

Comedy South West was born of the frustrations felt by its two creators on discovering that all too often tickets were sold out before most were even able to discover a gig was happening, often being sold-on over auction sites at hugely elevated prices. Rather than just sit back and mumble complaint about this, they decided instead to take action and set out to report all vendors they found to be bulk-buying tickets with the sole intention of making a huge profit out of those desperate to get to the gigs.

This still wasn't enough, though, and they decided there was a need for an agency sharing details of all upcoming gigs within the region in order that local people could be aware and get in early enough to buy their tickets hopefully before the scalpers could their mitts on them. Originally simply a Twitter network sharing information, the task soon grew into an obsession and so it was that the need to set up a formal website became apparent.

Over the past year, the site has taken off in a great way; alongside the listings and news are interviews with some of the comedians who have performed locally, gig reviews and now a brand new forum to chat with other comedy fans.

Another recent venture for the site was creation of a mailing list. This is a great way to ensure everyone is instantly informed of the release of gig information, because let's face it we don't have time to check in with all our favourite websites every day to see what is new do we? Mailings are sent out a couple of times a month, although it is rather dependant on when tour dates are released by the artists, and you can sign up here

With more than 600 Twitter followers, already a huge amount of subscribers to the still new mailing list and excellent feedback from comedians, venues and the public alike, Comedy South West shows signs of growing into a huge source of information for comedy fans.

Having achieved so much in this first year, we have to wonder what more these boys have up their sleeves to the time to come...

Sign up to the newsletter yourselves to find out!

Comedy South West wish to extend their thanks to all who provide information and feedback which helps the website to grow.

In particular, they would like to thank the venues who provide updates on ticket sales and upcoming events and the comedians who have taken part in interviews and shared information on their own gigs. In particular (although not exclusively), thanks go to Chris Ramsey, Robin Ince, Carl Hutchinson, Jo Caulfield, Rob Rouse, Imran Yusuf, Alfie Moore and Mark Olver for their ongoing support and Twitter love.



If you have gigs to submit to the Comedy South West Calendar please use the form here:
SUBMIT GIG

Or email the boys directly here:

Just Another Info-Dump

It's a while since I wrote one of these What's Hot posts, but there is so very much to tell you all about right now it would be remiss not to. I know, I really should do these with more regularity but what can I say? Maybe I will now, who knows...

So what are we reading/watching/listening to?

You should all have listened to the fourth series of the utterly brilliant Those That Can't. The final episode is still on the Iplayer for a day or two, so catch it even if you have missed the rest. We were all rocked by Chris Corcoran's announcement that series four is to be the last ever, especially as this is by far the best series yet. I guess going out on a high is for the best, but I for one am very sad! Should you have missed previous instalments, there are links to series' two and three here . Links for this series will be available once the current episode drops from the IPlayer. There was good news from Elis James on his appearance with Louise Elliott today in the form of an upcoming second series of the utterly fantastic Social Club FM! A big whoop all round for that!
Whilst on the subject of the fabulous Mr James; series two of Pantheon of Heroes is being recorded next month, to be aired some time in December. Tickets for the recordings are available here! There is also a show airing tonight on BBC Wales about his career to date. The pics below link to some youtube vids of outakes from the recording of the show.


Another of those things I should have told you about sooner was the second series of Everyone Quite Likes Justin of which the last episode again is sadly all that remains for you to hear. This has been a brilliant series, far better than the last although it does seem it was given a rubbish timeslot, so I hope the listener figures have been good throughout.

Back on our TV screens at the moment is Gwlad yr Astra Gwyn. If you did not pay attention the last time, be sure to give the show a try now. It has English subtitles (although not through the red-button setup, but through Sky accessibility) so there is no excuse even if you do not speak Welsh!

Last week I was lucky enough to see Greg Davies' Back of My Mum's Head Tour, at which he was supported by the equally great Ed Gamble. See the review for the details, but do make the effort to see the show if it tumbles by your town!
I was also able to see Wil Hodgson who is very funny indeed. (Review to follow in my usual lazy, procrastinatory way!)

There is a huge amount of brilliant live comedy in the area right now. Sadly, I am not in a position to see as much as I would like as the hub-creature is still in a bad way following his surgery but I will share with you everything I do get to! (or will at least try!)

Anyhoo... there is much more to be honest. Comedy is hot news right now, with a great deal of new TV and radio shows as well as the usual glut of comedians dragging their Edinburgh-honed shows far and wide. I shall endeavour to be more organised and share things as they arise so I am not left with 812 things to tell you about!

But for now that's enough to go along with!

Down

It’s a while since I had to post one of these “why I’ve been lazy” posts… the reason behind my silence of late should be clear to regular readers, but as I am aware I picked up a wave of new subscribers over the last few weeks I guess I need to explain myself.

Returning from my recent trip to Cardiff, I found the funk descending. It has proven quite difficult to shift; even now as I write this from beneath the duvet I have barely left for almost two weeks. I won’t clutter up this blog with the hither and thither; just suffice it to say I am suddenly glaringly aware of all that is wrong in the world right now.

But anyway – with that in mind, I do still have a job to do here, so am dragging myself back into the real world for just long enough to complete my little to-do list.

Ordinarily, I don’t share my lists with you all – but I am sure I am more likely to complete if I do so here it is:

• This catchup post
• Reviews from the Cardiff trip (x5)(x3)
• Completion of the Cardiff blog-within-a-blog
• Complete new static pages in progress (x2)
• Two vaguely topical posts which are both part-written
• Investigate image display options for a photo-set

And that is all!



Hope to be soon back to full speed, but in the mean time to be wading through treacle is at least an improvement!

Mixing it Up...

My regular readers (*waves*) will be familiar by now with the way things work around here… there will be ramblings and rantings, interspersed with the odd review, promise of a review or list of excuses for the lack of a review. I am taking a small diversion from form, however, to introduce a new obsession for you all.



From here-on, you can also expect a few posts referencing the upcoming Cardiff Comedy Festival as I endeavour to help in my own little way with their promotion. Please check out the Festival website and follow the links to buy tickets. There are some great acts appearing; some you may have heard of, some you possibly won’t – but it would be a dull world indeed if we all watched the same things time and again, wouldn’t it?!

Check here for a listing of the acts lined up- be sure to keep looking back as more acts are being added. Following will be a potted guide to the festival for those unfamiliar with it. In the meantime, find out a little more by taking a look at this footage with regards to the 2011 event:

Just a Quickie (Missus!)

Not even drafting this one, I'm so hardcore! (although without the squiggles it's gonna be hard to see where I have typed too fast for my eyes to keep up, so excuse typos, yeah?!)

Really living on the edge as only I can...


Keep up, people!



Just wanted to let you all know I am still very much here.

Mostly, anyway.

Check the other blogs for updates as to why I am quiet...


There are posts approaching, though. Have spent the past week writing a review of the fabulous Rhod Gilbert's Work Experience... as per usual trying to make it sound objective is the stumbling block, but I seem to have managed for the most part!

I wonder if I don't need more balance, so if you have something REALLY BAD you think I should review, please send it! Honestly, anything at all... I just need one review that says "This is utter shit!" I should be like a real reviewer and have my smart-arsed punchlines of hatred written out in preparation to copy/paste into the review, but that's really not my style...

Anyway, there is other stuff too... you'll just have to wait.

Oh, and the A-Z is taking a back seat for a moment I'm afraid... I had gotten as far as F and had a few later letters covered, but there is another project before me so I will sit on that for now! Continue to send suggestions, though... even for the letters I have done, as I can always add more. Oh, and those with a particular C suggestion - look at the rest of the blog, do really you think he needs adding to the A-Z too? I think I've said all I have to say on that particular subject, don't you?


Anyhoo... quick update over coffee becomes rambling nonsense... adding media/formatting and will be posting REAL stuff forthwith!

Appologies in advance to feed subscribers for a sudden hit today, but you can't have it all ways!

Happy Days, all!!



For no real reason ... some bloobreeze from my garden!

From the Brains of the Undead

Just a quick how-do so you all know I am still around.


The funk hit me for a time, which has been replaced with some sort of viral sinussy thing which really sucks!


Just so you know I am doing things:

A couple of reviews in progress, some radio stuff, some TV stuff and the BRILLIANT Charlie Baker/Josh Widdicombe combo I was lucky enough to get to last week. (ok, maybe a bit of a spoiler there, but can't be helped!)

I have been working on a pretty exciting A-Z type project, currently writing the bits I want to write in a haphazard manner so will upload those once they start to resemble the alphabet! The facebook requests will be combined within this so if there are any more you want, get in touch (facebook, twitter, email all linked to the right!)


What else? Loads... I'll get back to this at some point!

Oh yeah, I have translated a bit more of the Elis James C2 thingy:

HERE


Just lately I have been re-introduced to the wonder that is Boothby Graffoe... can't remember my earliest 'encounter' with him, but this is the oldest clip I can find online. He is one of few comedians who has changed absolutely nothing about his comedy over the years and yet his new material is as fresh as ever! (Should save that for his entry in the A-Z I guess, but I gotta sell you all on him cos he's fab!)




Buy his new album here:


Absolutely CRACKING songs!!

That is all...

Just Because It's Sunday

I can’t label this a summary… not quite sure what it is, but a summary suggests a rounding up of what has happened. This, I suspect, will be more a “What should have happened” – but that makes for a clumsy title and an even clumsier URL, so I shall just see where we go… often the best way!!


OTFAF:

Okay, I have drifted from purpose somewhat this week and the posts here have taken something of a nonsensical turn. The
fangirl post was something of a must… it has been a long time coming and a few of my readers were asking for more than the passing mentions I tend to make. I have learned from it (and from the –erm- interesting list of search terms reported by google) that I am not the worst to be fangirling over this particular target. Which puts my mind at ease slightly I have to say – maybe I am more normal than I thought!

The somewhat tenuous St David’s Day posting wasn’t as some seem to think a further ploy to crow-bar mentions of Wales into the blog. Yes, my heart is very much there, but that absolutely was not the intention! But crow-barring it was, as I wanted to share another Pantheon sound clip … you’ve got to admit it’s a good one!

But yes, I hold up my hands – this week has been pretty much one of nonsense and self-indulgence. I promise I will work harder next week!


STUFF TO SEE/HEAR:

There are a few things I want to get to at some point…

Firstly, the brilliant new BBC comedy sketch show “Watson and Oliver” – they are fab so watch it! The Bleak Old Shop of Stuff is every bit as funny as its Christmas special and it is fabulous that it has been extended into a full series. Pramface I am still not too sure on, but it’s new… so you could just watch it and make up your own mind!

Away from the BBC, this week marks the last episode of Stella… it has been a brilliant series and has given many an emotional moment as well as the obvious laughs… beautifully written! I am quite excited to see what Sky one bring next, as they have churned out some amazing comedies lately! I have been enjoying a lot of comedy re-runs lately – most notably the brilliant Green Wing – puerile nonsense, but I love it!

And of course the radio:

Did I mention the current series of Social Club FM with Elis James and that other Welsh guy?… I forget his name, you know the one!

There are new episodes airing of some old favourites: Just a Minute, The Now Show and Newsjack to mention but a few… also well worth a listen is Miles Jupp’s new show “It’s Not What You Know” … absolutely brilliant!



IN OTHER NEWS:

Because I have been working on projects needing me to face up to the emotion of the situation with the hub-creature, I decided to start blogging over the things I need to say – much as to get clarity than anything else. I am writing it for me, really, but the blog is open for anyone to read so if you want to take a look, it’s here: http://lifesastrugglesometimes.blogspot.com/

I won’t be posting here regarding updates etc, so you will have to subscribe over there if you want them. There won’t be accompanying facebook pages etc either, it’s not that kind of blog. In fact, I’m not even marketing the SEO or anything – it’s just an offloading centre!


What else?

Nope, don’t think there is anything else you need to know – now I just need to find a title!

Return to Base-camp

Not that I have taken a break or anything but with the child-shaped on holidays, the hub-person still in a bad way (having left the bedroom only 3 times since October) and given that I have been sleeping in two hour bouts since Christmas time I have been working on my laptop on the sofa mostly under a duvet for the last couple of weeks… and comfy though that is, it isn’t particularly productive. So today I have returned to my office. Not that today will be any better work-wise, since the children have taken it over and it is currently a huge mess… but I have cleared myself some workspace anyway – and have done a couple of PLT exercises I was cunningly avoiding (because I had reached a stage of having to look inside myself and was slightly scared of what I might find!) and now here I am once more in the midst of two reviews, researching for an article on auto-suggestion and (obviously) writing this piece for your entertainment.

All this and it isn’t even half ten yet! Frickin’ marvellous, eh?!

Something that has come out of my downtime is that I have rediscovered the joy of reading for fun. One of the issues with studying all the time is that there is a need to read relevant texts; this stops me from reading recreationally and I had really forgotten how great it was to give yourself over to a really good book just for the sake of it. I guess in a lot of ways this is why I have ended up reading… I can just say “the book” can’t I? You won’t be thinking I mean the Bible or anything, because we have an understanding, yeah? You know the one I mean? Anyway – the thing with ‘that’ book is that I can just pick it up and read without really thinking about it too much (or at all!) – Okay it kind of helps that as I read it I can almost hear his voice reading it to me… but that’s healthy enough isn’t it? I mean reading is all about using your imagination, right?

I picked up a heap of ‘other’ volumes written by authors of some of those books we have all read a while ago (Huxley, Golding and Orwell amongst others) and decided I could make a start on them – I’d forgotten how good it was to challenge the mind slightly; not to mention realising how differently our brains must function depending on what we are reading. I can generally whip through a book fairly quickly, even a non-fiction one given the right subject matter, yet it seemed to take me an age to plough through the relatively short “Darkness Visible” by William Golding. It was a peculiar process, whereby I found myself constantly re-reading sentences that didn’t seem to make sense at all to me to the point where I was almost wondering if reading was for me at all. As it happens, I am glad to have persevered with it and actually appreciate the journey of thought the book took me on; not through its theme but more for the linguistic tone and the way it has once again highlighted my relationship with the written word. Regardless, although it was a fairly good story, I am glad to see the back of it.

It used to be that on finishing a challenging read, I’d cleanse my palate on The Lovesong of Alfred J Prufrock or another Eliot classic… seems I have a new sorbet now as my first thought on having had that hour or so of digesting the closure of the story I had just read was somewhat predictably to blast through Random Thoughts again.

But anyway – tea-break over now; time to return to work!

Piff and Waffle...

I have noticed of late that much of what I write seems to hold better as a spoken piece than written. It’s an odd thing, but I can sit and read it back to myself and it seems to have no grounding; yet if I read it aloud there is substance and context… not sure what to do with this realisation such as it is, but there you go.

Were I the kind of person looking to tout notoriety, I guess I would be taking these works out as performance pieces or something… but we know I am not so instead I guess they will resign to the deeper corners of my hard-drive with all those other things I have cast aside until I find an appropriate voice for them.

I know why this is the case. I have been busy of late, so have not been facing a blank sheet of paper or computer screen to do my writing; everything is coming to me as I perform the idle tasks of my life. I used to drive a lot as part of my work and found that often I would have composed reams of poetry on my journey which all sounded fantastic at the time but was forgotten about once I reached the end of my journey. This led me to carry a dictaphone, recording what came to me to transcribe later (which in turn led to some very interesting journeys when I found myself commissioned to write some of those piece you don’t tell your mum about… but we shan’t say more about that…) and I now find I am almost constantly talking to myself as I go about such mundanities as cleaning windows, mowing lawns and hoovering.

*Digressing slightly, the little attention-deficient child within me feels the need to draw attention to the fact that whenever I try to type the word ‘hoovering’ Microsoft in its wisdom seems to think I mean ‘hovering’… I know it’s a proper noun, blah blah, but really do you think I am flying around my living room holding onto my little digi-dictaphone recording these ramblings? –well not this one, as this is purely written at my desk… but you know what I mean! Were I able to hover, I’d be using the skill more constructively than that – maybe getting the cobwebs off the ceiling, cleaning light fittings, reaching stuff on high shelves… you know, all the kind of stuff you need a tall guy around for – or a stepladder… but you can’t watch a stepladder do the work for you, can you?*

But anyway, in case you were wondering; that is why I have been quiet of late. I am writing. Loads. It’s just not particularly relevant here. Or maybe it is, but because it’s stuff I see as more than the rambling nonsense I think you expect of me I am looking for an excuse not to share; just in case you don’t see what I do in it.

If anyone watched Kevin Bridges’ new show “What’s the Story” last night (ok, a more diligent person would have probably reviewed it first before assuming you may have just seen it, but there are people who watch things without waiting to be told to, I am sure!) I guess I can liken it to his therapy session.

For those who didn’t, the set up is such:

Kevin visits a psychologist who happens to mention she recently saw him live. He asks “Did you enjoy it?” Her response: “Is that important to you?” And like a pair of squabbling siblings, they continued in this “What are you doing?” “What’s it to you?” way for quite some time, Bridges refusing to move on until she admitted to having found it funny; which then elicited the somewhat predictable “You are just saying that”.

This makes me view the whole after-show ‘meet and greet’ most comedians do slightly differently. Is the intention as we perceive it; to show how down-to-earth they are, to give something back to the audience in the form of photos, signatures, hugs and handshakes; or is it an attempt to still the doubts and insecurities of someone needing the constant approval of others? After all, the first thing anyone says to the comedian at these sessions is some gushing statement at how great the show was, how funny, that you liked them already from that thing on TV but love them even more now – those who didn’t enjoy a show won’t queue to say so; they are the ones slipping out of the theatre before the lights are even up just in case they bump into the star accidentally and are asked what they thought about the performance. No, we don’t want their opinions. These people happy to queue for an age in spite of having been stuck in a dodgy theatre seat, doing the awkward arm-rest wrestle with an invasive stranger for a couple of hours (or even worse, with one of those irritating guys who also insists on sitting with their knees spread wide leaving no leg-room either!); these are the ones to tout for compliments and praise.

Anyhoo… packing away the waffle-iron now, as believe it or not I do have more constructive things to write about!

Sunday Summary 29/01

I’ll be honest; I am closing this week in Quandary Lane, somewhere just off the intersection with Indecision Street.

There are a couple of things I have been working on of late of which I am quite proud and would really like to include here; I am concerned though because the subject matter is … well, it’s crude, sweary and likely to offend some… but I know some of you will like it as much as I do… so do I drag this blog into a pit of iniquity and risk losing some of you for the sake of sharing a few pieces of work?

I have been trying to re-write in a less -I guess graphic would be the right word- way… but I just can’t see the funny in it when it has been watered down; and were I writing a guide on how to be funny, I am fairly sure step one would be something along the lines of writing things which seem funny to yourself.

In terms of achievements this week:

• Not that I am number-driven, but my visitor stats have reached an all-time high here this week. Don’t get me wrong, I have done the research and know exactly how I could have hundreds of people passing by this blog on a daily basis; the steps I would need to take though would take me away from what I really want this blog to be, so I choose to plod along in my own way; and it’s always fabulous to be able to stick two fingers at the ‘experts’!
• Whilst TV and radio seems to hold little that is new right now, I have been looking further afield. I know some of you are tiring of my constant Welsh references, but there is some fabulous stuff to be found there right now. Starting with the brilliant “Gwlad yr Astra Gwyn” which I reviewed earlier this week and “Elis James Pantheon of Heroes” which is to follow (well, the review is ready to upload, just that I have to select a sample file to upload with it, which is proving tricky when the entire thing is so bloody funny!) amongst other things. I am trying to cover things which aren’t being covered on quite literally every review site, mostly because we do all become creatures of habit and I would like to help you break that even for just half an hour!
• There has been something of a resurrection of some old favourites on the BBC IPlayer – in particular, sitcoms Everyone Quite Likes Justin and Claire in the Community as well as Chris Addison’s The Ape That Got Lucky, sketch show The End of the World Show … the list is endless, so take a look for yourself at the comedy section of the listings and see if your old favourite is there.
• I have completed a huge chunk this week of that darker piece I have been referring to… I will try to post some sort of abridgment here, but I am not sure how that will work out without losing the full context. To be honest, with this being a fairly surreal piece, I am not sure whether to see it written down makes it seem a little silly… as a spoken word piece, it works really well, though! (I guess you’ll have to just take me at my word on that!)
• Oh, I finally filed my tax return too! That’s got to count as an achievement I think!!

So another pretty good week in spite of near zero sleep and general apathy… imagine where I could be by now if were a little more driven, eh?

Another something to think on, I guess!

And because I love it… here’s a clip from Everyone Quite Likes Justin, written by Justin Moorhouse and Jim Poyser.

This clip features Justin Moorhouse, Susan Cookson, Paul Copely and Lloyd Langford:

Sunday Summary 22/01

It’s been a funny old week for us at FE-HQ! The hub-creature and child-shaped people were all wiped out with the flu… which of course meant more running around than usual for me! Not good since I was hit with a minor version of their virus later in the week. Spending a day with no other symptom that a husky voice, I thought I was getting off lightly, but it seems not, since my energy has been zapped and I am now stuck with the worst case of vertigo ever! But I have done some work regardless, because that’s the level of commitment you can expect from me!

Highlights of the week:

• I had plenty of peace as no-one wants to visit the Plague House!
  
• I managed to set an all-time record for reading Chris Corcoran’s Random Thoughts … 34 minutes, don’t you know! And still laughed aloud throughout… really it doesn’t get old at all!
  
• I did some more work on a particularly dark project which is panning out to be something I am really proud of! (more on that another time, though!)
  
• I finally figured out a way to (legally) include content other than that from Youtube, so can better highlight my reviews now!
  
• Having a heap of downtime, I was able to complete a batch of reviews and an abridgment of a bigger piece to include here
  
• I have managed to spend some time tidying up the blog, adding media to posts without it and coding in the all-new “Related Posts” widget… what do you thnk?
  

There’s a load of other stuff that’s gone well this week… far too much to go into really, but you get into picking apart every small aspect of life and it’s just ridiculous really!

Let’s just say that in spite of the viral attack, this week has been a good one!

And because it really made me laugh, I want to share this with you!

A new show written by and starring Jason Byrne, starting Saturday 4th Feb at 10pm on Radio Two.

Zombie Apocalypse

I know, reviews promised… but my head is far too fuzzy, so for now make do with my ramblings instead. In case you are worrying; no, I do not have the flu which has floored everyone else… thankfully! I awoke yesterday feeling just fine to the sound of the phone ringing and as I answered thought “That’s not me!” At some point overnight, I had developed a peculiar huskiness you normally couldn’t achieve without blackened lungs and a shrivelled liver. With no other symptoms than a vague loss of energy, I found myself in a position where running a premium rate sexline suddenly seemed a very viable business opportunity. Today, however, that loss of energy has become an all-round vagueness, my head feels as though it is stuffed with bubblewrap with an over-excited child popping a few cells just often enough to cause discomfort and whilst the sultry voice remains, along with it comes a breathlessness and chesty cough that has others cowering away in fear… so not so sexy then!

It is very much feeling as though we are living in one of those apocalypse movies… I stocked up on groceries on Monday ‘just in case’ and we quarantined ourselves in order to prevent a spread – now we are at the point of preserving stock and rationing food so as to avoid going out… not that I am too ill for a trip to Tesco, but I really do not want to!

But anyway, in case you were worrying at the lack of posts, that is the situation here; hope you don’t catch the virus from reading this!

The radio is keeping me going at the moment, so I will share this with you all… because having listened far too many times to count, I am still laughing every time I hear it… a little Andrew Lawrence:

Andrew Lawrence discusses being described as 'Misanthropic': From his radio show 'What To Do If You Are Not Like Everybody Else'

Fruity Ponderings and Flu Avoidance

I feel as though I am living inside an old vaporub jar at the moment – that smell really permeates everything, doesn’t it!

I’ve managed to be cold-free for something like fourteen years now and really do not plan on succumbing to the one currently flooring the hub and kids; so this morning I did what any sensible person should do and went shopping!

Don’t panic, I’ve not been hit with an attack of spontaneous materialism, it was a purely survivalist excursion to nowhere more exotic than Lidl! Don’t judge me, though; I do not have the constitution to fight off pensioners at the market and Lidl’s is very much the next best thing in terms of gathering fruit and veg which can be eaten on the day of purchase – besides which, the benefit-bound aren’t even out of bed yet, so I can head there without fear of encountering any unsavouries! So I have stocked up on plenty of vitamin loaded, virus beating yummies and am now enjoying a (rather late) breakfast of hot buttered toast, grapefruit and ‘proper’ chocolate (94% cocoa - because I am hardcore!!)

And much like floating in an oarless canoe toward a waterfall, I now drift effortlessly towards my point:

Just who was it who made the decisions as to how we should eat certain foods? I don’t mean people coming up with recipes, but the real stuff – things we eat with minimal interference besides chopping, peeling etc.

Why do we play at the Giant’s teaparty eating grapefruit with a tiny spoon whilst we segment oranges of the same size to eat with our hands?
Why is it considered appropriate to sprinkle sugar over a grapefruit and eat it, whilst equally unpalatable fruits such as lemons are resigned to the rank of ingredient/decoration?
Who decided pineapple and coconut were worth the effort needed to reach the flesh?
Who declared the grapefruit a breakfast food, tomato and cucumber to be used for salads and squashes to be vegetables?

And most importantly, who the hell ever thought a piece of fruit could constitute dessert?


These are the things I found myself pondering over whilst packing away my purchases and painstakingly scoring my grapefruit.



In fact, I was reminded a few days ago of being given my first pomegranate as a youngster. As baby and I walked home from school, we caught up with the little girl next door. She was eating one as she walked (hence her being so slow that we caught up with her!) and baby asked her “Are you using a spoon?” “No, it’s a pomegranate fork!” – Actually, it was a chip-shop fork, but I’ll let her off since the poor girl has probably never seen the inside of a chippy! It seemed a strange thing though to give a child as part of their packed lunch… what ten year old has the stamina to eat a pomegranate? I was probably around twelve when I first saw one and was given a threaded needle with which to eat it. We were hardcore beach scavengers, ‘catching’ a lot of winkles and such so eating with a needle wasn’t a big deal but nevertheless I soon bored of the repetitive process: choose, spike, eat, choose, spike, eat, choose, spike, drop… it seemed unending and eventually I just couldn’t be bothered so had an apple instead. Coming from the home of “waste not, want not” though, my fruit was placed in the breadbin and I was expected to return to it as often as necessary until it was gone; day three, I cast it over the garden wall to ‘feed the birds’ living in the trees beyond because nothing is worth that much effort!

But anyway – such ponderings have me lusting after a strong cup of tea and I still have to complete those reviews I have promised you all. (Plus I am working on a contingency in case I should find myself floored by this strain!)

That and you find when there is a case of flu within the household that people visit less and "Can't stay". Add a second patient and they will only chat on the doorstep until by victim number four you are completely in quarantine... so knowing my time will be my own for a couple of days at least I should also have time for another read of this:



Did I mention, it's a great book ?! ...

Sunday Summary 15/01

I do have some proper posts to put up later, but I know those of you only here after the closure of my other blog are used to the Sunday Summary and as such here ‘tis! (not that I make any promises to maintain the regularity or promptness you are used to, but I shall try!)

So:

Highlights of the week:

• A brilliant new focus which has me with a brimming folder of character profiles, new ideas, different ways of making old ideas work etc.
  
• I have developed a new resolve after whiling away some of the time I had allocated for not completing my tax return on calculating the costs of freebies over the last year – and as such sent a few people on their way. Odd to call this a highlight I know but in actual fact it’s a mark of a newly strengthened character, since the ability to say no has long eluded me (read into that what you will!)
  
• The re-enforcement of just how fantastic my girls are as they (the older ones, anyway) tried to persuade me that I should take the trip I was planning for the summer and broke down exactly how they would cope without me! (I’m not going, because I can’t justify the huge cost for just a week away, but regardless the fact they are so supportive is amazing!)
  
• I know I have said it before, but I have found the perfect house! And it falls in a location approved by the Dark Destroyer of Dreams, so even better! (oh and I will be in Wales in a few weeks; hopefully it will still be available then so I can go have a snoop!)
  And for relevance here:
  
• Some real moments of funny in:
  
  • Some time of reminiscence as well as a few laughs from my rediscovery of the hilarious Harold Lloyd
    
  • Obviously, The Rhod Gilbert Show which was absolutely hysterical this week – which great though that is, meant I was unable to work whilst listening as I usually do… but I needed to laugh more than I needed to write!
    
  • Stella, the fab new comedy drama from Ruth Jones
    
  • House of Rooms – this week’s brilliant channel four offering from Milton Jones
    
  • Some true old-school chuckles on Sky Arts in the form of Saturday Night Live episodes from the late ‘70s and the fabulous Monty Python films
    
  • The return to the Iplayer of series one of ‘What To Do’!
    

So all-in-all, a pretty good week as they go!

Now to complete the coding on those other posts and make them ready to upload…

Character Profiling...

It’s a tricky balance sometimes, the need to lock oneself in a room alone to write conclusively vs the obvious need to be out finding things to write about.

My previous existence managing a sports facility gave me plenty of character ideas and stories to tell, but provided little in the way of constructive time to actually commit any of them to formal text; thus I found myself in search of a voluntary role in order that I can simply step away and write when I feel the need to.

I spend one day a week working at a brilliant place which runs computer-based courses for all, teaches life skills to those let down by a failing education system and assists the unemployed in making themselves employable; searching for jobs, completing applications, preparation for interview and so on.

I have the opportunity to meet a huge range of people of different class, nationality and intellect and thoroughly enjoy every minute of the work I do as much for the amazing array of characters I encounter as for the chance to put my skills to better use than the usual waffle and twad I churn out!


At the present time, I am writing at my previous place of employment; no other reason for this than “Because I can”. It tends to be my go-to place; somewhere to hide from those who feel working from home means having nothing to do but hand out free coffee and chatter all day; somewhere to be around people who no longer ask “when will you?” “why didn’t you” “couldn’t you just?”; somewhere to simply write for the hell of it. Alright, they do throw me the odd free coffee from time to time, but I put in a lot of hours for them over the six years I worked here, I earned a few coffees at least!

So here I am; writing character profiles on those around me; making judgments as to their habits and hobbies; inventing jobs and families based purely on the fact they have chosen to come out today in a red jacket or that they arrived in a beaten down Vauxhall Corsa.

There are times I suddenly realise I am knuckling down and taking my work more seriously and this really is one of them. For the most part, people think I spend my days hiding in the office doing nothing more constructive than refreshing my social networks; and I’ll admit, there are times I realise I could take on far more work were I better able to focus and aim for a faster turnover. Spending a couple of hours scribbling in my notebook, though, and finding myself with a heap of transcribing to do and some new ideas to work up I can see just how differently I am coming at the whole process than this time last year. Maybe this is the year I actually decide to package myself into one of those neat little straight-edged, pointy cornered boxes people are so keen on... or maybe not.

Fairy steps, I think... a few character profiles and a couple of really exciting new ideas are really not enough to warrant choosing a genre, are they? ... especially given that the new ideas are so very different from one another!

But changes are afoot, nevertheless...

As always, watch this space!


Seriously, keep watching....


Don't look away, now!

Renewed: Administrative Housekeeping

I know it is going to seem as though I have been just kicking back of late, but I assure you I have not.

I have been shuffling a lot of projects around, finding more effective ways of working and the outshot is this:

• My long-term personal blog is to be wound up. Whilst I do post there daily, I have found of late that the pressure to do so is making it ever harder to fulfil commitments here and elsewhere… so those who subscribe there but not here should be re-thinking. Of course, the content here is not as intimate, but as time goes on I am finding it easier to be myself – who knows, I may soon be using my real accent and everything!*
• This blog needs regular new posts; all part of the SEO so that people find the reviews when they are current. Not that I proclaim to be an expert in SEO or any other geekness, but I certainly know far more about it now than I did a year ago! This means that from time-to-time there have to be slightly off-topic posts so I will stop apologising for them. Likewise, I will stop apologising for ads… they are essential as I need to make a living. Your clicks would be appreciated, since I get the income for clicks rather than for just having them there at all… especially considering I do take the time to check through the settings in order to keep them vaguely relevant instead of just signing up for an ad-service and letting them put whatever they choose.
• Having finally decided to listen to those who give unsolicited advice, I shall start to write with more idea as to the outcome. No more sitting at a blank page and just running with whatever comes out. I am unsure how this is going to affect you or whether I even need to be telling you, but there it is anyway. It could be that being so organised this blog becomes sleeker, tidier and less haphazard; or maybe the opposite could be true as my brain melts down over having to be so structured with my other projects. Don’t know, don’t much care right now… but there it is.
• I will also stop using this blog as a means to avoid other (more important) administrative jobs, such as… I don’t know; tax returns for example. I spend far too much time mulling over which things to publish, whether this post needs a video or photo, do I already have a picture or should I head out on a shoot? … all at the expense of filling forms, mailing invoices and other equally tedious tasks… this ends today! (well, tomorrow!)

*for those who only know me for this blog I know that reference is lost; all I can say is that one day I will post an explanation, and when I do you will saviour that small moment of “Oh! So that’s what she meant!” but for now, just indulge me please!

So there you are… and since I am in the midst of three new pieces, not to mention the several I already have written and ready to be coded and published, I bid you farewell for now and look forward to the evolution of this blog.

Youtube-ness

Even in the face of current sadness, life has given a few small chuckles today; another classic event from baby; a prime piece of ownage (or is that pwnage?) at my expense from the oldest; a most random text from Miss-middle and some youtube links I have been emailed for possible review which – well, thankfully it’s not the comedians themselves who have requested the reviews, so at least I can happily just not include them without concern that they might be offended by my silence. In fact, there were a couple of links I was sent that did have me wondering if there wasn’t some huge practical joke afoot at my expense… seriously, people, you know how hard I find it to say bad things – and you also know I’m too OCD to start watching a video and not complete it; so to send me off to 45 minutes of utter drime is at best inconsiderate. WTH?? So now the Microsoft Corporation is trying to tell me the word drime doesn’t exist… well I use it – a lot lately! – so clearly it does. In fact, having used it twice now in this very article I think I have illustrated quite clearly its existence, definition and context so screw you Oxford English! But anyway, all videos sent have been viewed and the fact that I am linking to none of them now must tell you something I am sure.

I do feel I need to point out that I am not a sharer of viral videos and as such would rather not be sent footage of cats being – well being cats really – no matter how hard you try with a soundtrack and fancy production techniques; neither am I interested in children being bratty and obnoxious; nor do I care to pass my time watching video game footage with ‘hilarious’ banter attached. But if you have something that truly is funny then please share either here or through email or facebook (or Twitter, I guess… although I still have not gotten around to figuring twitter out yet!)

I would ordinarily feel the need to link to the last thing I viewed, but I ended up following a train of “others like this” that took me to a very strange place indeed so instead something I like to watch from time to time and a song which will now be stuck in your head for the rest of the day:




And if anyone should find the un-bleeped version anywhere, please share! Hate the bleepy bleepness!!